100? I can hear you already wondering what that is and how it relates to me, but 100 is what it says, it is my own personal milestone in cooking, whereby I have finally surpassed the 100 recipe marker. It was a marker that I didn’t set myself to achieve, I simply cook recipes that are from my heart and soul and all the awards or achievements that may be gained from such a marker mean little to me, it is the food I create that is the real winner. I started this journey off just over a year and a half ago, I wanted at first to show to my close friends my cooking style and what food I like to eat. 

 

I began cooking in a way that best describes the way I am feeling inside, it tells to other people who I am as a person. I liked the response from my friends every time I created a new recipe, they all could see that I had real passion within food and that I was bringing those passions to the front in the form of a photo instructional guide. The guide I created was a way to show to others every stage that is necessary during the cooking process. I find it to be a huge bonus, as whenever I need to cook a recipe that I have already produced, I simply need to look within my photos and see exactly how and what is needed in producing any such recipe.

 

The guide also gave to people the freedom in cooking that they were looking for, a way to see each process for what it really looks like. It is sometimes hard for people to understand cooking if the only images they see are through a simple method, ingredients list and photo that to some makes the cooking seem like such an incredibly difficult task. I do of course include the method and ingredients within my recipes, but it is the photos that I have to offer that really stands me out from the crowd. I like to take each photo in the best possible light, even if it was as simple as capturing each ingredient in its opening stage, it must have the look to it that makes people want to create any particular recipe I was producing. 

 

It is sometimes hard to keep capturing each stage as I cook, such as when I am frying meat or onions I have to quickly take a photo, put the camera in a safe place which would be the worktop next to me then begin to cook again. It is a tough and tiresome affair at times, but I get so much pleasure in what I do. I get to show to a huge audience what it  means to have the freedom of expression within you. In my expressional world I try to produce food that I know in my heart people will like, in a way I am a performer on stage showing to the audience something new and unique and hopefully they cheer and not boo. 

 

The thoughts of boos are not valid in my world, as in life people like certain things and they dislike others, so in my food I try to keep a good selection of recipes by giving to people choice and variety. The variety I present is not coinciding myself to just one countries food but many, as I like the different ways people express their foods. This is why I have had such pleasure in producing so many recipes, as there is a whole world out there with many interesting foods that many of us know little about. This is why I set up my cooking page, I wanted to show to people that all came from different places in the world the choices that exist not solely through their own country but of many other countries. 

 

The response I have gained from this approach is one that simply cant be categorized or grouped, it is something that is on its own and shines out to all those who view any recipe I produce.

 

The food I have produced over the past year has grown in leaps and bounds. I always think that once you have you have you reached a sustained level of excellence you will only want to improve on what you have already learnt and experienced. Much is the case with my cooking, I started off cooking simple yet elegant Italian recipes, to where I am now which is producing cakes with such an artistic outlook involved and also my new found desire to include fruit within each recipe I produce.

 

I hope by including fruit in my recipes I am showing to others that food can still taste aromatic, but it still will hold so much goodness within. I hope also that people will like these new and exciting fruit based recipes, in a way I am opening a door for people to view, a door to a world of food that if you want it to, it can enrich you and give to you all the familiar flavours you may have been used to, but you may not of known that fruit was a key part in making an average recipe into something that will really excite all the food lovers out there. 

 

I know too that I will not stop learning or improving in all I do, I’m always looking for the next recipe that will really open another door into cooking. As a child I would sit and watch hour upon hour of cooking shows on tv, my passion for cooking was inside me, hidden away from view but I knew in my heart I had to let it out, show others this passion and hopefully in doing this I would open up more as a person and I believe in all I have done I have become a better person for it. 

As you all know I have my artist partner named Natalie Williams, she drew my cooking page profile photo and I actively help promote her art onto my cooking page and to my friends I have on Facebook. I try all I can to show to others her art and why I think she has a rare and unique talent that people need to see. The relationship that me and Natalie have is more of a brother and sister relationship rather that friends, I can tell her how I am feeling and know that she is always there for me and know that she will never judge me or say unkind words. She is a true friend that I am so glad to have in my life as we can all search our lives for friends we want and never find ones that really are there for us when we need them the most. 

 

As Facebook is a huge global entity I had noticed that it wasn’t solely people who were using Facebook, but companies, hotels, night clubs, bars, swimming pools, anybody and everybody was now attached to this global social networking site. I figured that I should add some of these new found establishments, if anything just to see what they are about or just to see if any fun and interesting events may be happening. This was when I first met Bar forty-two. 

 

I sent a request to be friends on Facebook to Forty-two, which was accepted and seeing as if so many of us add people and then never speak to the person we have added I felt compelled to speak to my new friend. I asked a few questions in what they were and what they do and it was a total pleasure that I made contact as the owner called mark is a great guy and so easy to get along with. He discussed what his new bar was like, what it stands for and what it means to have something new in a town with so many rival pubs. As soon as we started to speak I could see a similar pattern as I had with Natalie, the love and affection in what forty-two was trying to achieve was the same as me and Natalie. We all have our own separate genre of art as call it, but we are all the same in our view of art we try to make others see something that is different or unique and showcase that style in the best manner we can produce.

 

Forty-two were a new bar in Worthing, fighting to be noticed in a crowded space but they were trying to do something new and different with comedy nights and live music and just a general feel good factor and warmth within their bar. As is the case with many pubs or bars the same type of outlook or goal is implemented, so it was nice to see that someone out there was trying to be different, trying to have something that others didn't, which is much like me and Natalie we both trying to stand out from the crowd and be noticed and in my new friend I could see the same pattern emerging. 

 

It only took one conversation and I had already made up my mind in what I first wanted to do, this was to become partners with forty-two as I had done with Natalie. We would help promote each others work and in doing so it would help us both be seen by people that we would not have done if we hadn’t of agreed this new found partnership. I look at the word partnership as something more that just partners, I look at it as a friendship for life, a friendship that can’t be bought by money, it’s a friendship of two people with similar goals in life who are both trying to become successful in what they do but both need to help each other out, or more simply put just to know that you have someone with similar dreams who will be there for you when you need someone the most. 

 

Forty-two were really happy that someone had taken a liking to them and their styles and another plus side was that not only were they having me as one partner they would be getting Natalie too as wherever I spread my wings Natalie will follow with me. After a few more conversations between me and Forty-two I had another great idea, this idea was to have one piece of Natalie’s art within their bar. I suggested this idea to Mark and how it would benefit not only themselves but also to a young talented girl. 

 

I discussed the finer details to Mark about how it would be a unique piece of work and how it would really make a corner of their bar into something pleasant and interesting for the customers’ who would visit. After a few more discussions the plan I had was agreed to all what was left was to tell Natalie of this idea and also to let the ball start rolling in letting Natalie and Forty-two discuss what is needed to make this happen. Some time passed and I noticed a status that Natalie had wrote about her commission for Forty-two, not only had I managed to help her gain some of her dreams she would be paid for her work. 

 

This to me was such a wonderful thing to know I had set a plan in action, it had been agreed to, it was live and in action and my friend who I like so much was being paid for all her hard work and dedication. She later told me that her parents were over the moon with joy, that they were so proud of her and how far she had come. I know we all try to do nice things for others and try to make people feel good inside, but I know that I have given a girl some of her dreams and that I have helped make her parents proud of her. 

 

The most incredible outcome to of come from this whole experience was when Natalie had finished this drawing,  Mark actively drove the 200 mile trip to Devon from Worthing to collect this piece of art. This shows to be a willingness to make this idea I came up with into something of true inspiration. This was an amazing thing to see that not only was Natalie’s art being collected from her home but also she and Mark would meet. I was told later that they had a great time together when they met and that to me is what this whole experience was about, it was connecting people with similar goals and dreams and in doing this I have helped make new friendships that will stay for life. 

 

I ask for no credit through this whole experience, I didn’t create this piece of art, I didn’t travel the 400 hundred round trip to collect this drawing, I don’t own this piece of art or collect any awards, all I want to do is show to others what the possibilities in life can be if you give you love and support to the people who mean the most to you.  I gave Natalie the chance to express her art, I let her met Forty-two and now that they’ll be friends for life. As in life we are all looking for friends we can trust and rely on, friends that are their for us when we most need them and friends that simply put their heart and soul into everything that they do.

 

I can see all these qualities in Natalie and in Forty two, we are all different in our lives in what we like and do but we all share the same passions and loves, this is why this whole journey we have all undertaken has become something we will never forget, as all 3 of us will simply have to look at this drawing and know that we have created something so inspiring. The credit most go to Natalie as she had produced another piece of art that really showcases her personality, it tells you how she is feeling and how she views life.

 

It isn’t always easy in life to show to others you who you really are, or what your personality is like but in this drawing it is clear to see what Natalie is like as a person, she is someone who has such a creative aura about her, she strives to produce art that not only she considers to be good but also to the public that views it. So from now on her art will be on show for the whole world to see, anybody who enters Forty-two will see her style and hopefully they will feel the same as I do when ever I see her art, a sense of excitement in seeing a young, talented artist’s work on show. 

 

This is now then end of this journey, it was something I will never forget for the rest of my life, it will always be there with me, in the back of my mind, in my heart it will always remain with me. This feeling I have is echoed by Natalie and by Mark, they will sit and think how incredible this whole experience has been, and know that they have done something that if anything is fun and enjoying, and they both know in themselves that they have played a huge part in making this into a true success.

 

I will now let Natalie say a few words on her ventures in art, her love for what she does, and also how she feels about this about this whole experience. 

 

 

Natalie’s words:

 

We all have something we do to occupy that space in the mind which is usually filled with "what to do" or thinking over some stressful situations you might be in. Its always good to get away sometimes and give your brain a good "reset" to take the challenge head on a calmed mind. It could be reading, watching your favourite program, making models, even cooking! Mine is art. Since I was very little, I've always used drawing to empty my mind and space out from things, like when I drew I was in this little imaginary box that no one could invade. At 19, I have discarded the box and now allow people to see what I draw.

 

I never produced anything spectacular (besides bags and books full of thousands of doodles) within the past 6 years my art has taken a huge leap and I've been developing new skills with every picture. 

A little inspiration goes a long way for me, and in secondary school is where it started when we were told to design a "CD cover" for "Famous British Music". This being my first time in this art class as the project developed I had children asking me questions and telling me things, like "You spelled Britain wrong!" (I'd put Briton...) yet another child said "Leave her alone, spelling it wrong makes it look funky!" In honesty, I had just miss-spelled it, but after what she said made me feel better about a simple mistake and decided not to correct it. She was right, it looked funky. 

Feedback- amazing inspiration. After it was finished it was put into an art exhibition! At 13- my first piece of art up on display for people to see! Lots of comments and feedback, I found a release to be able to express myself despite being so shy, I could find a small way of getting people genuinely interested in me.

 

Though this piece of work has since gone missing I never saw it after the exhibition. 

 

Of course as I got older I developed interests and found new ideas and inspirations. One of my hobbies is to dress up as well known characters from stories. 

I go to huge meets where hundreds of people, I've learned to become a bit more outgoing. During one of these meets I found a talented prop maker, and had used a social website to track him down and eventually found him. Through his friends list, comes John Sanford. More feedback on my art and we became good friends exchanging ideas and feeling of personal relief as a way of making new friends. Of course after hearing my story, John had sought down someone who was also interested in my art style.

 

Of course they had become my first ever commission! Both my parents were over the moon as well as I. It was a piece i could achieve, using an art style that I love. My customer too, understood a good need to express, and I was overjoyed to be able to use features I love, especially colour! I made sure I did my best and it was great meeting my first customer, and once again receiving the feedback I love.

 

If you would like to see the art Natalie drew for Forty-two, please visit: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150313810427638&set=t.100000863768102&type=3&theater 

 

Priorities...by me

We should always be sharing reasons about why we live, what we want from life and what we want from others. I don't see why we should be polite all the time - I'd rather get to the point..and my point is to merge with someone through love and fun without condition - isn't love supposed to be unconditional?

Why is that what we want so much from other, we are most afraid of sharing? Where's the gain in avoiding pain?

So we deal with sensitive stuff with others through humour and games--and we become surprised that they're not much different from us! - and so we start to think...

Why search for love and answers if we think it's futile or we'll be scared if we actually get what we want?

Anyway, why take a chance on your most powerful desires being returned if it could turn to most your powerful disappointments - and pain?
why do I love anyway whense sense should've made me insensitive - to protect me from pain?

ENOUGH questions! I am what I am and will be me and have unlimited trust in my beliefs instead of listening to someone's fears - not becausing I'm making a point, but proving that I AM that point and therefore merged with its beauty even if it's not immediately returned.

The possibility of unconditional love is still far greater than the complaints and the second-best many people seem to settle for.

The fountain of real love - even imagined - is more profound than the antics of those who pretend to know stuff but never actually believe in true love.

Love is EVERYWHERE - just see it (it's right in front of your nose)!

 

...am I dreaming?

I am here - I'm not quite sure who I am - yet I know what I don't want to be...

I care about stuff in a way that's hard to describe - but very important to me - I can make all kind of weird but true connections, which hard to describe - but I feel are very important for me.

I need to express myself--sometimes rather sensitively - because this is my way. I pay attention to little details in life that most overlook. So I take nothing for granted-->I'm just f*cking clumsy at expressing myself!

I keep thinking I need to find ways to be more myself with others-to climb out of my cocoon and express all this inside stuff...especially to those most important to me (I owe them that). I don't want to hide in my own mind - I want to share with and connect with others.

But most important, is that they finally understand what I've been trying to tell them all along!

Confessions of an Enlightened Teenager

Hi Dad,

...if you actually are. Sometimes I find it hard to believe we're even related...in any case I'm finally becoming me and allowing myself to explore the world as ME - not as an expectation of what you think I should be. If you love me, you'll wish me well even if our 'conversations' are getting more difficult.

I'm learning that my changes as I grow as a person affect those around me who matter, so I've realised that I have to be careful to let them know what I'm going through, and prepare for that they may be going through their own shit and not always have time to 'get' me - which will feel a bit lonely. 

Dad, we can still have the occasional meal even if you don't understand my cooking...I'm still going to work hard in my kitchen even if you decide to like what I'm serving. Anything I create as a growing, independent person are MY children and show me how beautiful and unique I am - if I burn a meal, I'll learn not to next time - because I tried something new and still want to keep trying - not because you tell me what I should because 'you know what's best for me'!

It's MY voyage of discovery - not yours - and I'm loving every bit of it (but also a bit afraid).

I love you, Dad - but stay OUT of my kitchen!

My job is to allow the real me to develop and gain power to make hard decisions and even look after loved ones with their occasional problems. I'll keep practicing to become stronger and I'll make loads of mistakes - but they'll be MY mistakes, so I'll have no one to blame but myself...and I plan to go all the way to be the best, true me - even if you or anyone else doesn't want to take me seriously. I'm going to keep being me because it feels right - (and who else can do it better?) - and on the way, I'm learning to love being me!

I'm sorry Dad you have a problem letting me go - I've had to get used it-->no blame...You'll learn (like I have) that letting go of the familiar is painful - but necessary part growth.

...and the more I'm learning, the more I realise that I'm not alone in this vast universe--->and that I NEVER will be!   :-)